As one chapter transitions to the next, it’s my friends who have my heart. The ones who know me, love me and tolerate all of my annoying traits of which there are many. The ones who want to know what I’m reading, what I’m thinking, how my kids are, and what my day in day out life looks like. In the past nine months, it’s been constant texts, emails, calls, videos, WhatsApp threads, reels, memes, social media dm’s. Connection, laughter, and love are peppered throughout my days as I make my way on this small island and big new life. 

After over four years abroad, the logistics reduced my contact with my long-time friends. However, I was blessed to cultivate new trusted friends during my time in Switzerland. The adventures we shared are indelible. Hiking the Alps, navigating culture, language and exploring Europe and leaning on one another with the many ups and few downs of expat life. In a beautiful twist of fate, our Swiss neighbors transformed into friendships and people I love. Their generosity to be open to friendship when there was a high probability I would return the 6,000 miles from whence I came is humbling. Merci Vielmal.

I am no different than most of us who have been blessed with bonds of friendship. Friendships are to be cherished and nourished. They are precious mirrors of ourselves that don’t crack with wear and tear. Sometimes they need to be dusted off or put aside temporarily due to the demands of life. It’s the preciousness of the connection that I relish. The swelling in my heart as its warmth travels up my chest and throat as it then transforms into a smile when I think of or hear from a friend I love. How precious is the time I have with these people I get to surround myself.

The profundity of my gratitude for those I am lucky enough to call Friend is heightened because of the transition I am in. When my marriage began to unravel, I was 6,000 miles from home while making a new home in a new country. The time difference between my long-time friends was as vast as the vulnerability of meeting new people and awkwardly introducing them to my new struggles. I decided to keep my marital challenges private. I learned, when the primary relationship in your life is unsteady, the amount of energy it takes to understand, process, heal, hope, and care for it requires protection.

Now as I begin anew on this lush western corner of the USA, I am once again far away from my friends in both countries but I feel as connected to them as ever. As if they were right beside me guffawing or walking amongst the conifers. The certainty of which I feel this makes life so meaningful and humbling.

I’ll leave with a Lucille Clifton poem one of my dear friends sent me last week, a perfectly timed delivery of grace that is no coincidence. She accompanied the poem by writing two words alongside it, “Nourish Her”. 

I wish you all friends who nourish you like mine. 

There’s a Girl Inside 

There is a girl inside.
She is randy as a wolf.
She will not walk away and leave these bones
to an old woman.
She is a green tree in a forest of kindling.
She is a green girl in a used poet.
She has waited patient as a nun
for the second coming,
when she can break through gray hairs
into blossom
and her lovers will harvest
honey and thyme
and the woods will be wild
with the damn wonder of it.

 Blessings and Light,

Ellen